Hacks.

"20+ year career. 500 drug controls worldwide, in and out of competition. Never a failed test. I rest my case." - Lance Armstrong tweet

Remember back in the 80's, when 60 Minutes did their hatchet job on Audi, claiming the cars took off by themselves, even though the drivers were standing on the brakes? And then, when it was shown that while the drivers thought they were standing on the brakes, they were actually standing on the accelerator, which is why they drove into storefronts, and rivers, etc.? And this was long before today's "sophisticated" electronics which make Toyotas really take off by themselves? And when presented with the actual facts, that due to a slight design flaw the brake and accelerator pedals were a little too close together for big American feet, they just ho-hummed and moved on to the next ambush victim without so much as a mumbled "sorry" to Audi?

Yeah. That 60 Minutes. They're going to do it again this Sunday. I'll miss it, because I haven't watched it in over 25 years. See if you can't miss it, too. And I hope a million cancer survivors march on CBS headquarters in protest.

The Best Super Bowl XLV Ad You Didn't See..

..unless you were watching Armed Forces Network in Afghanistan, or from a carrier in the Gulf..



Some find the fact that our servicemen don't get to see the real commercials on AFN as slightly un-American. I think I agree, but if all of the PSA's were this well done, they'll be all right.

"This is what we do.."

Just ignore, for a moment, the fact that Chrysler is now owned by FIAT (Fix It Again, Tony), and the US taxpayers... better yet, just imagine a Ford Focus ST, or Fusion Hybrid in the place of the Chrysler 200.. Or, just forget about the car completely, because the car's not what makes this, hands down, the best ad from Superbowl XLV:

Hockey! Everything Else is Just..... Sports.

(Leon Halip/Getty Images)

That was the scene in Ann Arbor this afternoon, as a Guinness World Record Breaking crowd watched the University of Michigan hockey team shut out arch rival Michigan State 5-0 in "The Big Chill At The Big House". Michigan has led the nation in attendance at football games for most of the last 4 decades, but football has never hosted a crowd this big: 113,411!

The increase over the previous Guinness record hockey crowd could hardly be classified as incremental. The previous record? 77,803 last Spring, in Germany. For a little icing (no pun intended) on the cake, this was also the largest crowd to ever watch any NCAA sporting event.

Adding to the fun, the ceremonial puck drop before the game was performed by Michigan Alumnus, Lawrence Kasden. But that only seems appropriate, doesn't it?

And, as if that wasn't enough cool hockey for one day? NHL Network is broadcasting Hockey Night In Canada... in 3D... Canadians v. Maple Leafs! Does it get any better than this for a hockey fan?

FREE is Good!

We're familiar with the local Denny's, because that's where the draw for local hunts is always held. Other than those events, we're not likely to breakfast at Denny's, or any other similar chain restaurant, preferring locally owned diners and restaurants.

But when breakfast is free, we're always there, dude. The above ad was one of the best of the Super Bowl, as well.

And so, we found ourselves in a very crowded lobby this morning, waiting for a table. The list was long, but the efficiency of the cooks, the waitstaff, and the table cleaners (which looked suspiciously like management), was impressive to observe, and soon we were seated, with coffee (no, the coffee price was not $5.99), and were placing our order with our waiter, Robert who, despite the frantic pace, remained cheerful. Or gay. Possibly both. Our free Grand Slams were in front of us in about 2 minutes.

That's livin'. Yum.

Putting Those Donations to Good Use.

No.

Not the donations sent here to help out Dutch Salmon's family. I'm talking about the money donated to PETA. (Not by anyone who reads this blog, of course, but those other people.) They're not going to be able to help out all those widdle cuddewy-wuddewy furry critters... you know, the ones they end up euthanizing... if they're blowing 3 million bucks on a pornographic Super Bowl commercial.

Alas, we won't get to see the cute lady do herself with a broccoli. NBC decided the ad was too racy. It's OK though... PETA was just going to lie to us.

Like always.

Whippet Owners Will Relate...

John McCain Accidentally Left On Campaign Bus Overnight

VEEP Debate Observation.

I'm glad we're not playing the "nuk-u-lar" drinking game while watching the debate. We'd be really, really drunk.

Even Mindless TV Can Rock.

Who watches "America's Got Talent"? We got kind of hooked 2 years ago. So tonight we'll see the final 5. If America votes intelligently....*

these guys are my pick to be standing at the very end.

Amazingly, differently, entertaining.

*"No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people."- Henry L. Mencken

Doppelganger.

The nation held it's breath.

The question on everyone's mind: How would she do? This would be a role she'd never before been cast in. The Republicans were tense. Democrats, too. This could be the deal breaker... or the deal maker of the whole presidential campaign.

In the end, as if there was ever a doubt- she didn't just hit a home run. She hit it clear out of the park.

"Dan", you're saying, "have you switched parties?".

Of course not. I'm talking about Tina Fey on SNL last night:



Perfect. Right down to the Frances McDormand "Fargo" inflection. She's still so damned hot! And a major talent on both sides of the camera.

As if I ever had a doubt.

(Watch it while you can.. NBC apparently doesn't like its stuff on YouTube for some reason, and this may be pulled.)

UPDATE: As predicted, NBC pulled the clip off YouTube, but thanks to Andrew at Regal Vizsla we've got another link up. Watch it while you can.

The Real Original Mavericks.

A new Republican ad, shows McSame and Michael Palin, over a bunch of misleading statements, and calling them "The Original Mavericks".

FactCheck hasn't parsed this ad yet, but the title alone is the biggest lie. I mean, c'mon, I'm old enough to remember, so you'd think a real geezer like ol' dishonest John would remember too... the real "original Mavericks"......

Nobody Does it Like Jon...

Tired of political bullshit, lying, and hypocrisy?

There are straight, academic places online where you can get the straight scoop. The best of these is Annenberg's FactCheck.Org which analyzes political ads and campaign statements for accuracy and context, regardless of political party. I check it out every time I see an ad that raises my blood pressure.

But I enjoy laughter and humor with my political exposés, and for that, there's only one place to go, (and all the great HBO and Showtime programming aside, the real reason I want satellite TV in the Express), and that's The Daily Show:



This segment is being hailed, on FARK, as the best Daily Show segment... ever. Pushes all of my (political) buttons.

Fun For a Couple More Days

Olympics are almost over, but this was too much fun to pass up! Check back as it'll change daily.

"She's Dead....... Wrapped in Plastic!"

It's quiz time, kids! Having nothing better to do last night.. (Margaret's still in Ann Arbor selling everything).. I decided to start watching my Christmas present.

Margaret originally got me the first season of 30 Rock (see? not a jealous bone in her body). But I had already watched it on Netflix, so she had to get something else. What did she get me?

(I'd prefer not to get Google-assisted answers... let's just hear from the folks who actually know without looking it up) ;-)

UPDATE: We've got two guesses so far... I'll post all the comments when I decide we've had enough fun. I think, though, it's time for a hint: One of the main characters is Harry S. Truman.

Who is That Guy?

This has been driving me crazy.. ever since the first "McCain for President" TV ads started up here... (running incessantly about every 15 minutes). They always end up with this picture of some guy..

...supposedly this is John McCain. Does he look like this guy?

Now that looks like McCain.. (doing his best Pete Coors- well known right wing Nazi- impersonation; love the way the pocket flaps wave in the breeze!). Could it be that the first image has been manipulated to make him appear more... oh, I don't know... younger? Presidential? ...instead of like the old guy in your neighborhood who stands in the yard in his bathrobe, shaking his fist at all the cars, and yelling at them to "slow down!.. whippersnappers!" Hey, it works for all the fashion magazines.

Democrats Have Cooler Funerals.

With "Friends" (of the planet) Like This, Who Needs Enemies?

There are times I'm really glad we don't have satellite, or cable TV access. This is apparently one of those times.

Any of you who may have viewed the Planet Green network in its brief life, let me know if it's really this bad...

"It's impossible to say whether the show's smug superiority is more grating than its anorexic thinness of content, but seeing them in combination may fill you with a kind of retributive rage. I for one want to go out and kill a dolphin."

"Grapes."

If you don't know who this is, I feel sorry for you. Got a rare chance on Saturday night to watch the Red Wings game on Hockey Night in Canada on CBC out of Windsor, Ontario. After the game we got to see this.. Is that a great suit, or what upholstery? And that's not all.

Great Television.

When PBS began promoting Carrier way back before Christmas, I knew I wanted to see it. A documentary film crew was given unprecedented access to the nuclear attack carrier, Nimitz, and also to it's crew. The program is 10 one hour episodes.. we missed the first two hours on Sunday, but caught the hours 2 and 3 last night. All episodes are available online.

For someone who spent four years in the Navy.. without setting one foot on board a vessel of any kind, (until, with only a month left in service, spending about a half hour visiting the USS Repose hospital ship in Danang Harbor), I'm finding the whole program fascinating. I'm almost glad I had the shore duty I did! Aircraft carriers are like a small town of 5000 (!) diverse residents, most of them very young, crammed into about 4 acres. And for 6 months at a time, they can't get away from each other.

Tonight, the ship and crew enters the Persian Gulf.

All hands stand by.

BONUS: The sound track is awesome. Playlist on the website.